RESUME QUOTES OF THE WEEK
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Genghis Khan: My primary talent is downsizing. On my last job I downsized my staff, my organization, and the populations of several countries.

Marie Antoinette: My management style has been criticized, but I’d like to think of myself as a people person.

Special skills: Experienced with numerous office machines and can make great lattes.

Reason for leaving last job: The owner gave new meaning to the word 'paranoia.' I prefer to elaborate privately.

My fortune cookie said, 'Your next interview will result in a job -- and I like your company in particular."

Exposure to Italian for two years, but many words are inappropriate for business.

Not a good letter of resignation but funny.

Dear Mr. Boss:

I'm thrilled to inform you that I'm resigning.

I have been waiting for what seems like forever to inform you that I’m resigning. I’ve hated working for the company since the day I was hired. I don’t like the work, I don’t like my fellow employees, and I don’t like you.

I am tendering my resignation effective immediately and I’m heading for the open road. I bought a Harley and a leather jacket and my girlfriend, Denise, is coming along. It was a little tough to find a jacket to fit her, but we managed.

I know you would like me to help you with a transition, but I won’t. Have fun figuring out the files on my computer. I can’t even figure them out most of the time.

Oh, speaking of computers, you’ll need to figure out the passwords to all our online resources. I forgot to keep a list of them, so have fun with that.

I’m sure you’d like to have a going away party for me. However, I’m not interested in the stale cookies and nasty punch that constitutes saying goodbye at this company.

Don’t worry about writing me a reference, even though I’m sure you’d be glad to recommend my work. I don’t need or want one. I don’t need references where I’m heading. So, consider our bridges burnt.

See ya,

Happy To Be Gone